"The eye is the lamp of the body. So, if your eye is healthy, your whole body will be full of light, but if your eye is bad, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light in you is darkness, how great is that darkness!" (Matt. 6:22-23). Jesus spoke these words on the Sermon on the Mount.
Of all the amazing things he said, I think these are probably my favorite lines because they are about perception and I am fascinated by the concept of perception. It is a complex subject that involves so many aspects of ourselves: personality traits, temperament, our belief system, what your parents taught you, to name a few. A person's perception is sometimes referred to as a worldview, which serves as a kind of filter for everything we know and believe about ourselves and our environment.
Music stirs our emotions, movies make us cry. But then we move on pretty quickly to the next thing. In our fast-moving, pleasure-seeking society, its hard to stop and think about how we perceive the world on a deeper level. We don't often ask ourselves questions like, "Is there a Creator?" "What is my purpose?" "What happens after I die?" These are existential questions that we may not answer directly, but guess what? We all have some sort of answer for each one even if we aren't conscious of it.
Dr. John Thomas (Thomas & Sosin, 2011), one of my favorite professors at Liberty University, says that a person's worldview is made of four raw materials: cosmology, teleology, epistemology, and axiology. Academic words, but their meanings are pretty familiar.
Cosmology involves the Creationism vs evolution debate. In short, how did we get here?
Teleology concerns the purpose of life and asks "What is the meaning of life?".
Epistemology wants to understand the source of truth and knowledge. A biblical worldview (Judeo-Christian), a man-centered worldview (humanism), empiricism (science), and rationalism (reason) are the most common ones.
Axiology is our concept of right and wrong. Are there universal, God-established moral laws or does man make them up at his convenience?
If you think you've no answer to any of these questions, Dr. Thomas suggests considering your beliefs on these hotly debated topics: abortion, sex outside marriage, gay marriage, and capital punishment. Your answers will depend on how you answer the four "ology" questions above. Jesus' statement that the eye is the lamp of the body means that we view the world and its ever-changing ideas of right and wrong from a much deeper perspective than we may realize. And that view will lead us to either spiritual darkness or light.
People sometimes seek counseling because they are in an internally "tangled" state of conflicting emotions and confused beliefs based on a morally shifting foundation. They have never stopped to consider their perception of the world and instead simply adopted what others say is true. The problem is that, despite vastly different opinions on the answers to the "ology" questions, everyone is supposed to somehow be right!
At the end of his Sermon on the Mount, Jesus describes the fate of a foolish man who "built his house on sand" and a wise man who "built his house on the rock" (Matt. 7:24-27). Rain, flood, and wind slammed both but only the house built on rock, the solid foundation, was left standing. Christian counselors hope to lead hurting people toward building their lives on this foundation and these vital questions can be a great place to start.
Source: Thomas, J. C. & Sosin, L. (2011) Therapeutic expedition: equipping the Christian counselor for the journey. Nashville, TN: B & H.
Sunday, September 29, 2013
Monday, September 23, 2013
Parakaleo Hugs
We have a very happy little girl. Most of the time. It seems there are two conditions that turn our joyful child into a miserable one: hunger and tiredness. The combo of these is especially powerful. Many times I've picked up a smiling, laughing person from school only to witness an amazing transformation. Over the slightest disappointment, the smiling girl becomes weepy and inconsolable. Her range in this state is anything from whining to outright sobbing. This can happen any time but I've found that the minefields are before school, after school, dinnertime, and bedtime.
After a few years of parenting these intense moments, I've learned both wise and unwise ways of responding. She is pretty much beyond reasoning in that state so the reasoning strategy is out. And if she hasn't disobeyed in any way there isn't much of a discipline option. So what to do?
I avoid getting swept up into an emotional state myself (esp. if I'm tired and hungry too) and keep my voice low and calm. I tell her to take deep breaths and to try to speak without whining. These MOs are helpful but they don't solve the problem.
My child needs rest. Or food. But the best medicine is neither. What is most helpful is simple: a hug. Not just any hug but a hug that demonstrates humility and unconditional love.
Noutheteo and parakaleo are Greek words used in the Bible. Noutheteo means to admonish, warn, or exhort. It is generally used in the sense of trying to correct a person's wayward behavior. Paul used it often to describe how Christians should hold one another accountable. In 1 Cor 4:14 he says to the church, "I do not write these things to shame you, but as my beloved children I warn you." It is also essentially what parents do when they correct their children.
Parakaleo can also mean to admonish but the meaning is a little different. More than outright rebuke it means to call to one's side, to entreat and console someone who is struggling. It is an encouraging, comforting attitude toward another. 1 Thess 1:11-12 says, "For you know that we dealt with each of you as a father deals with his own children, encouraging [parakaleo], comforting and urging you to live lives worthy of God, who calls you into his kingdom and glory."
Being able to tower over your child when you mean business is a handy advantage, but in these times we've found that the wiser approach is to get down on your knees, be eye to eye, and offer an open-armed embrace. Our precious little girl always accepts the invitation by crashing into our arms. This simple, humble hug has a profound impact on her little heart because it demonstrates God's unconditional love and grace for her.
As imperfect people ourselves, it is good to remember that sometimes we, too, need this same embrace from God when we become a blubbering mess.
After a few years of parenting these intense moments, I've learned both wise and unwise ways of responding. She is pretty much beyond reasoning in that state so the reasoning strategy is out. And if she hasn't disobeyed in any way there isn't much of a discipline option. So what to do?
I avoid getting swept up into an emotional state myself (esp. if I'm tired and hungry too) and keep my voice low and calm. I tell her to take deep breaths and to try to speak without whining. These MOs are helpful but they don't solve the problem.
My child needs rest. Or food. But the best medicine is neither. What is most helpful is simple: a hug. Not just any hug but a hug that demonstrates humility and unconditional love.
Noutheteo and parakaleo are Greek words used in the Bible. Noutheteo means to admonish, warn, or exhort. It is generally used in the sense of trying to correct a person's wayward behavior. Paul used it often to describe how Christians should hold one another accountable. In 1 Cor 4:14 he says to the church, "I do not write these things to shame you, but as my beloved children I warn you." It is also essentially what parents do when they correct their children.
Parakaleo can also mean to admonish but the meaning is a little different. More than outright rebuke it means to call to one's side, to entreat and console someone who is struggling. It is an encouraging, comforting attitude toward another. 1 Thess 1:11-12 says, "For you know that we dealt with each of you as a father deals with his own children, encouraging [parakaleo], comforting and urging you to live lives worthy of God, who calls you into his kingdom and glory."
Being able to tower over your child when you mean business is a handy advantage, but in these times we've found that the wiser approach is to get down on your knees, be eye to eye, and offer an open-armed embrace. Our precious little girl always accepts the invitation by crashing into our arms. This simple, humble hug has a profound impact on her little heart because it demonstrates God's unconditional love and grace for her.
As imperfect people ourselves, it is good to remember that sometimes we, too, need this same embrace from God when we become a blubbering mess.
Monday, September 16, 2013
Let Steadfastness Have Its Full Effect
I wrote a verse from James in my journal recently. I've read the entire verse many times but I have never really thought about the particular phrase "let steadfastness have its full effect". The passage reads:
Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing. James 1:2-4
What a standard! Perfect? Lacking nothing? In just typing these words I am conscious of all the things I lack (e.g. profound insight, awesome writing skills, unselfishness). Since perfection is impossible, James must have meant something else. So I turn to some helpful resources to figure out what is meant by "steadfastness" and what it's effect is supposed to be.
Steadfastness in this sense is the Greek word "hypomone" which is translated as patience, endurance, or perseverance. The full effect is "teleios", or something which is brought to its end/maturity/lacking nothing for completeness. Faithfulness, through all sorts of trials, works in us to produce a remarkable patience and ability to persevere which leads to spiritual maturity (i.e., Christlike character).
The phrase "that you may be" implies a state of being, not just something that happens to us supernaturally and then fades away when all is well again. Its an inward transformation of character. As such, we become complete, or "holokleros", meaning we have no blemish or defect.
Since we are loaded with blemishes and defects, God gave us a loophole. Romans 8:1-2 says"...there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you free from the law of sin and death".
In short, we're to "let" perseverance by faith change our character so that we become spiritually mature and possess Christlike character traits. This is a life long process and a mission that will not be fully accomplished until we see Christ face to face.
I think of Jesus' words in John 3:21 when he tells Nicodemus, " But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what they have done has been done in the sight of God."
I am encouraged when I read these verses because, at the end of my life I want to be able to look back and say, "This (whatever that may be) is what the Lord has done." In other words, I want it to be obvious that the Lord has used my life in a way that glorifies his name and brings about things that only he can do. My task, then, is to not get in his way and "let steadfastness have its full effect".
Tuesday, September 10, 2013
Truth Dispels Darkness
When Paul listed the parts of God's armor in Ephesians 5 he was preparing us for spiritual warfare. Christian counselors come alongside hurting people to help fight this battle.
People often come to counseling with what I think of as a "tangled ball" of emotions, fears, and false beliefs. Counselors help their counselees sort out these issues and, hopefully, lead them to the freedom found in a relationship with God through faith in Christ.
Not everyone will be reception to the gospel of course; however, Christian counselors trust in the work of Holy Spirit and know the He is the one who softens hearts and opens eyes. Interestingly, people are often not aware of their own feelings or beliefs. For example, someone may acknowledge anger and resentment but not realize that he carries a deep sense of shame and guilt. Another person may find fault with everyone else and remain unaware that she believes she is unlovable.
The counselor, with Christlikeness, provides a safe haven for people to explore these issues in the light of God's love and grace. Secular counselors certainly help people "feel better", but this state of being is only temporal. Salvation through Christ, freedom from sin and Satan's deceptions, sanctification, spiritual maturity, mental and physical health: these are the goals of Christian counseling.
Truth, through the power of the Holy Spirit and God's Word, dispels darkness.
People often come to counseling with what I think of as a "tangled ball" of emotions, fears, and false beliefs. Counselors help their counselees sort out these issues and, hopefully, lead them to the freedom found in a relationship with God through faith in Christ.
Not everyone will be reception to the gospel of course; however, Christian counselors trust in the work of Holy Spirit and know the He is the one who softens hearts and opens eyes. Interestingly, people are often not aware of their own feelings or beliefs. For example, someone may acknowledge anger and resentment but not realize that he carries a deep sense of shame and guilt. Another person may find fault with everyone else and remain unaware that she believes she is unlovable.
The counselor, with Christlikeness, provides a safe haven for people to explore these issues in the light of God's love and grace. Secular counselors certainly help people "feel better", but this state of being is only temporal. Salvation through Christ, freedom from sin and Satan's deceptions, sanctification, spiritual maturity, mental and physical health: these are the goals of Christian counseling.
Truth, through the power of the Holy Spirit and God's Word, dispels darkness.
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